How Animals Eat Their Food
this is my fav thing omg.
Can I be this? How do I be this?
if we’re really in sync, I wonder if you thought of me now.
probably not, coz it’s 3am there.
sleep tight, sexy.
Sometimes I would prefer feeling sad. The grounding feeling. The long breathes. The immobility or the lack of will to move. The constant thinking and daydreaming, what if it was like this. The longing for this and that person.
I miss being this sad. It’s familiar. It’s comforting. Like nothing else in the world matters but the loss and the hurt you’ve experienced. Melancholic and tragic. So much feelings and thoughts cries out of you in bursts of creativity and expression. It’s both wanting to be alone but reaching out to people who are also alone. The irony of oneness in isolation.
It’s been a while. I have not been this kind of sad for the longest time. Looking through my tumblr, I remember the emotions. I am visiting my past and reliving those moments. I feel grounded. I’m sighing. I have not moved from the couch. And I am writing as I daydream. I realized I still long for this and that person.
Then I let go. Sadness was my home once before. It’s still comforting and I return my love to it as it has loved me once. It has nurtured me enough to leave home and build my own home. But I will always look back to sadness.
Thank you, this and that person. Thank you for the sadness. It is the only thing I got from you but I will cherish it always for it has honed me and nourish me to grow.